Anti-JT: Spawn of Ear Wax
by HeroineCruor
Summary: This is making fun of Johnny Test and all it's characters. I hate the show. This is the real story about how Johnny came to be. It's safe to say that he wasn't born like everyone else. Rated K plus for horror and humor in a weird mix.


**A/N: I hate Johnny Test with a passion. Suck it.**

**I felt a need to post an anti-fanfic about it since I barely find ANY of those in this fandom. I felt like I really needed to help here.**

**Typos and grammar errors will be ignored. I don't really care for expert writing in this fanfic.**

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No one will ever forget the day that the ear wax morphed; September 17th, 2005.

It happened at the hospital. A nurse was driving a wagon to the patient with his medicines and nutrients for his medication, which consisted of an apple, a banana and a few ear drops. He was suffering a block in his auditory canal and had just arrived this morning for the cleansing of the canals, and he was frankly a stubborn man who wanted to get home, since her needed to work. His name was Nathaniel Johansen.

The nurse entered the room, a polite smile on her face, putting up a fake one of his own, pretending to be happy over the cooperation when he resisted the urge to rip those medicines out of her hold and sprint his way to home.

"Mr. Johansen, your nutrients. The doctor will come and clean you out soon." Grabbing an apple and taking a bite, he nodded in apprehension. The nurse walked out, his eyes trailing to the windowsill in longing of getting the heck out of here.

_Ms. Foongus order is due tomorrow. I have to finish it toni- _A sudden cough forced it's way out of his throat. This was taken lightly until he coughed again...and again...and again. After each powerful cough, he tried to soothe his throat with anything, water preferably, but there was no sink nearby. _What kind of hospital is this anyway? _Nathaniel thought irritably as he seeked every nook and cranny in the room after anything, _anything, _to wash down with. He had wanted to ask for help, if it weren't for the fact that he was a very proud man, and would do anything to keep up his status as the most successful man in Town, and the richest. It was not going to crumble down by some simple water.

He decided to take the closest to liquid as possible; his wax. Poking his ear, he fished up a dreadful lump of yellow-brown wax and hesitated no second to stick it into his mouth. Chewing vigorously, he took anot,her, this time handful (don't ask), and ate it with determination to wash down his throat. Assumably, it was in no comparison with real water, but it was better than nothing. Of course, with 'nothing' he meant everyday life for normal people.

Then Before his mind went blank, he felt something wiggle inside his auditory canal. It felt as if a snake had snuck it's way into his ear and wanted to come out of his brain, it felt undescribably uncomfortable. He could only errupt a scream as he felt the unknowing Life-form struggle it's way out, only remembering one color before his soul left his flesh and blood.

Brown.

A nurse came rushing in, feeling used to the alarm, but stopped dead in tracks upon seeing the non-human figure in front of her. As she stepped back a few steps in horror, her heart raced quicker and breath fled her nose drastically and her body wouldn't listen to her brain commands.

The brown form morphed, soon into an anthropomorphic shape, sooner what looked like a boy. The nurse was entirely convinced that she must have passed out and was dreaming. Now, there was two, light-blue big eyes ascending from the brown mass, arms gaining a beige color, clothes generously (and mind-saving) put on, and a very bad-flash animated grin. He had flamy color at his hair tips, eyeing the shocked nurse, who had her hands clasped over her mouth.

"I didn't see that coming", she heard his chime, and if not for the wall thumping against her back as she walked backwards, she would have fallen to the floor and passed out. Finally, a scream ripped the way out of her throat in terror, as his silhouette began to loom over her. Her mind went black.

A few moments later, doctors, guardians and the janitor ran into the room, and could only find a window standing ajar, the curtains blowing in the light wind and a trail of brown sludge tracking from the center of the room to the window. A corpse of the richest man in town was laying there lifeless also. Soon there would be sirens screaming throughout the neighborhood, news reporter, interviewers demanding answers from the police who sincerely couldn't answer their questions about the small, unknown murderer. In a matter of time, they had labeled him as "Wax Morpher", seeing as there had been strong evidence examined on the floor of such an unusual murderer.

A few reports got sent in of a nurse who had gone missing. One week later, she was found in a forest on the outskirts of town and put on trial.

The investigators worked their hands and brains beyond what was good for them, trying to find this person.

A few days later, a boy was adopted from an orphanage a few miles away, to the Test family, and they named him Johnny Test. Little did his new family know that he might have had a connection to the infamous crime that had occurred miles away.

When no one was looking, a sinister smile would cover his features, wax running down from the lines of his teeth.

**THE END**

**BONUS SCENE**

"Gil is so hawt!" Mary and Susan panted like dogs, seeing his toned muscles and pretty, girly-shampooed hair. Johnny gave them an irritated look, quitting to beat around the bush coming to their behaviour as he spoke with a hard voice.

"You are so _blind_. Anyone living in a awful-animated world like us can see that he's gay as a daffodil." A smile came off his lips as they worked their brain on one of the simplest conclusions of why they might have never caught his attention.

"OMG, Johnny!" Eyes widened as he was caught in a big hug and got a sloppy kiss on each cheek by his sisters. "You're a _genius! _Mary, let's turn into boys! Come, let's kill men and gather their y-chromosomes!"

"I got the massacre kit!" Mary exclaimed eagerly, plucking a couple of hatchets, handcuffs, and hockeymasks. They put on the hockey masks, yodelled and then the Dexter rip-offs ran off.

Johnny stood there, staring at their forms vanished from his vision.

"They learned from the best," He whispered to himself as he poked wax out of his armpit and chugged it down like ice-cream.

A while later, he was killed by the haters of the show (who was 1, 2, 3...arghh, can't count, they're too many!), cheers hollering down the streets in USA as the show got cancelled. Oh well, Johnny was retarded anyways.

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**A/N: Muahahaa, kill that little venom-spreading disease! XD I like writing crap about shows I hate and shows I love XD**

**It's worth noting that I had an ear wax block when I was 11. It really, hurts, I'm telling ya. Very painful experience. You don't want it, trust me. So I exaggerated, mixing the hate of Johnny Test with it. I hope you like. Flames are welcome!**


End file.
